A few months back, my dear mother was suspected with osteoarthritis. Thank God it turned out to be joints pain due to stress. I’m so grateful she has now went back to work with impeccable condition. She‘s just being more careful with house works and try not to stress out at work. She said, “Oh, I’m getting old.” I said, “It is okay. You’re also getting even more adorable day by day.”
On one of the days when I was home, taking care of her, three of my friends texted me almost at the same time, coincidentally. People say ‘Nothing happens by accidents’. Perhaps, it is just a way God telling us something, so we need to look very closely to our everyday life. Three friends were asking me about our incoming programs – three friends and three separate programs – to confirm whether I’ll be joining them or not. So naturally, I replied their text messages with a no and briefly explained that I need to be home with my mother.
One friend replied “okay” and asked when I will be back so we can discuss some matters regarding our club administration. Another friend also said “okay” and asked about my mother. I replied briefly, explaining about my mother’s condition and she didn’t reply back. The third friend, after I replied his text message, promptly called and asked thoroughly about my mother’s condition. When these happened, I had a very long thought that night.
We can be friends with everyone, but we must be selective on who we are calling our true friends. We must, at the same time, keep an open mind that people can change for better as they walk through life. Perhaps, they are not that insensitive, they just have so many things in mind at that time they forget about what’s more important. Or, maybe, I’m the one who’s not sending the correct message to them so they think the matter wasn’t that serious.
I learned a lot about empathy that day more than any other days in my life. A simple gesture as in asking about one’s condition might have a big impact on somebody. To be truthfully caring is something that we must cultivate in ourselves, not just a thing of common in every people.
The most important thing that I came to conclusion later that night after the long thought is ‘our friends are like mirrors to us”. We treat people the way we want to be treated. We give and share and love unconditionally, and then it is natural that we attract people of the same kind to our life. So the question came back to me, “Am I being empathy enough?”