We can choose what kind of persons we want to have on our sides, as well as how they react to us. People’s reaction is the result of our influence on them.
I read a story somewhere I can’t remember – about a farmer and two men.
The first man met the farmer at his farm which is located just outside a town. This man is about to be transferred to the town by his employer. He asked the farmer, “Tell me about the people whom live in this town.” “What kind of people who are your neighbors where you live now?” the farmer asked him back. The man answered, “Oh! They are arrogant people. The only thing they care about is their lives. They love to show off. They rarely greeted me when we meet. None of them care that I’m about to leave.” The farmer smiled and replied, “Those people in this town are exactly like that.”
The second man was about to move to the same town and came to look for a new home for his family when he met the farmer at the same place but different time. He asked the same question as the first man. But to the question “What kind of people who were your neighbors where you live now?” this man answered, “Oh! They are nice people. They care for my children like they are their own. They are warm at hearts and they love sharing. They even organize a farewell party for my family.” Again, the farmer smiled and replied, “Those people in this town are exactly like that.”
This story teach us that our environment is a reflection of ourselves.
It’s a simple story but it left great impression on me – this is what happened every time I consciously put a knowledge I gained to a test.
My friends and I were seated at a restaurant. They waitress passed us by and my friend called her, but she said “Wait a second” because she was busy collecting bills from tables near us. She didn’t smile at all. She even had a sour face. My friend said, “What a face for a waitress!”
When the waitress finally came, I said to her, “Are you OK? You seem tired yet busy.” And… she smiled very sweetly and then proceeded to take our orders. Now. The amazing thing happened when she came again to collect our bills – she transformed to be a warm and happy person. While her fingers are busy calculating the bill, she told us that she was having very bad ulcers and it was very hard to, even smile, let alone talk (despite the fact that she was narrating the story complete with showing us her ulcer). Later, she thanked us, told us to “please come again” and even bid us goodbye while we walked away.
In a nutshell…
It is interesting how a small gesture or acknowledgement can warm a person’s heart. I read (again, somewhere I can’t remember) a wise advice that says (not exactly the same sentence, but the gist is there):
Once in a while, when you come to a restaurant with an unfriendly and not-so-nice waiter, remember that he/she is human. A simple act of acknowledging her lack – maybe tiredness, bad mood or sickness – might spark a response that surprise you.