I Am A Rider

Advanced Project 4

Humorously Speaking Manual

25th September 2013

“5 more projects to Advance Communicator Bronze! Keep going!”

I have a secret. Many people thought I wear high heels because I feel elegant or they elevate my self confidence. But actually, I started wearing high heels because when I have to stop at traffic lights on my motorbike, only with high heels on, both my feet can properly touch the ground.

Good evening, fellow Toastmasters, ladies and gentlemen.

Most of the time when people call me while I’m riding, I don’t answer them. But sometimes, when I expect important calls, I do answer. But there are times when these calls that I answered turned out to be not-so-important calls. Usually, after stopping at roadside and realizing it’s a regular call from friend, this is what I do. It is almost like using a headset, just slightly bigger. “Ah hello hello! Can speak now.” “Ajan, why is it noisy?” “Oh, I’m on motorbike.” “On bike? Can speak now?” “1. You’re already speaking to me. 2. Don’t yell! I can hear you clearly.”

Imagine this scenario. I was happily singing while riding my bike one fine day. There’s a massive traffic jam about half kilometre ahead of me. Suddenly, a car came from behind me, went past just slightly next to me with high speed, nearly knocking me over, only to get in line and join the other cars in the traffic. I didn’t understand what happened. But I suspect he wanted to show off his turbo engine. I feel like stopping next to the driver’s seat, make him roll down the window and sing, “That don’t impress me much. Ah! Ah ah ah!” What did I do? I purposely changed lane to be next to his car and wave like a Miss World. Watch me go ahead of you, calmly, happily.

One of the things that I like to do on bike is singing. My karaoke talent comes from hours of practicing on motorbike. I can’t help it. When you wear helmet with full visor like this, it gives the stereo effect, like head phones. It’s a strong temptation. One day, I ride with my sister behind me. We stopped at a crossroad. I was happily singing until my sister slapped my back. “Aww! What?!” “Stop singing! That brother across the crossroad is staring at you.” The genre of the songs I sing usually depends on the traffic or weather. When it rains, it gives the mood of Hindustan video clips and I start singing Hindustan song. “Humko humise churalo.” When I’m doing 120kmph, fast beat and high notes songs usually comes to mind, like “What Doesn’t Kill You Makes You Stronger” or rock song “I wanna heal, I wanna feel, what I thought was never real.”

Other than singing, believe it or not, most of my blog entries are written when I’m on the road. There is something about driving or riding that calms my nerves. And thus, helps with my flow of thoughts. Sometimes, when I’m desperate for ideas, I’d drive one or two rounds around the neighborhood to clear my mind. The problem comes when I started to focus on the flow of thoughts. There are many times when my mind was overflowed by ideas – Toastmasters, blog ideas, speech, a famous quote, something I forgot on my to-do list – and suddenly, I went pass the junction to my house. And the u-turn is about one kilometer ahead. By the way, that is 50 cent of petrol considering the petrol price hike last week.

One thing that I’d really like to do during rush hour is when I go pass the cars in between lanes, I feel like waving all of the drivers behind me like a Miss World. “Bye bye. Bye bye. I’ll go home first. See you at home.”

Do you know the fly over at Danga Bay which goes beyond the land above strait water? Every time I take that ramp, this is what I do, “Superman! Wuhuu…!” Sometimes I purposely choose that road to do that.

Fellow Toastmasters, ladies and gentlemen,

One day when I have a car, I won’t sell my motorbike. Too many good memories. For the time being, I’d just enjoy the moment with my boyfriend, JJN 2176. “Superman!”


Author: Ajan

An aspiring speaker & writer who believes in cakes, cats and compounding return.

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